Tuesday, October 10, 2023

People and books and panels

 I'm excited to moderate People of the Books: A Jewish and Trans Authors Panel as part of Goodbye Assembly Row this Thursday, the last event at All She Wrote Books before they move to their new location in East Somerville. Sim Kern, Kyle Lukoff, and Aden Polydoros will talk about their books ranging from middle-grade to adult.

And see Out of the Box for a few other outside-of-our-homes my colleagues and I will be doing in the next week or so. Hope to run into some of you at something!

Saturday, April 1, 2023

For all you true-crime fans out there

Update, April 2: Unfortunately, if you really want to learn who stole Gilbert Blythe's heart, the only way to do that is to read Anne of the Island (as my sister and I have been doing lately over Skype). Or, really, read any of the Anne books or watch any of the adaptations.

For unrelated but highly recommended reading material, see Horn Book Press.

And if you'd like to spread silliness and other goodness year-round, check out Parodies for Charities.


Kingsport, Nova Scotia— Magog Studios announced plans for a true crime podcast centered around Redmond College. (It was originally scheduled to release two years ago, but was delayed due to related circumstances on Prince Edward Island.)

The crime to be investigated is the theft of student Gilbert Blythe’s heart. Classmate Anne Shirley is a person of interest, and Royal Gardner is suspected of being an accomplice; other suspects include Ruby Gillis and Christine Stuart. Host Charles Sloane will interview people familiar with the case, including Shirley’s housemates Priscilla Grant and Stella Maynard and their housekeeper, identified as Aunt Jamesina.

At this time, housemate Philippa Gordon is said to be deliberating about whether to appear.

Friday, April 1, 2022

Apparently, nothing is inconceivable!

Update, April 2: I suppose this is conceivable, and if this book were unearthed, I'd love to read it...but for now, it exists only in my April 1 imagination.

For more silliness (for a cause even better than fooling people), check out Parodies for Charities


For immediate release

New York, NY – Guilder Press has uncovered a previously unknown manuscript by “S. Morgenstern,” the penname used by the late author William Goldman for the wildly popular The Princess Bride (1973) and the lesser-known cult classic The Silent Gondoliers (1983). The manuscript was among the papers of Goldman’s editor. “He must’ve been planning to read it, but you know how busy publishing gets,” said a staff member who’d been helping to clear out the office as the company returns to in-person work.

The manuscript, titled THE SPINLESS WHEELS, tells the story of Moe, the greatest driver since the invention of the automobile, who is denied the opportunity to use his talents by a traffic jam on I-95 in New Jersey, and his quest along with the other stopped drivers around him to pass the time and, eventually, to get things moving again. Guilder Press offers a sneak peek at the opening:

Traffic scientists disagree as to which was the worst traffic jam in history. After all, how does one define worst? General consensus is that duration and number of vehicles are the most important elements, but should they be the only ones considered? Do weather conditions or overall misery count, and if so, how much? Those in the duration camp cite the ten-day China National Highway 110 traffic jam, while for weather-watchers, the August Florida Foul-Up wins hands down. For misery, you can’t beat the Wine Country Wind-Up, given the state of the passengers’ collective bladders.

But whatever their metrics, all agree on this: they would not have wanted to be on I-95 in New Jersey on the day Moe Torist set out.

The release date is yet to be determined, said the staffer, citing a paper supplier stuck in traffic.


P.S. See the Horn Book's Out of the Box blog for another piece of exciting literary news!

 

Sunday, November 14, 2021

Miracle Max, Jellicle Cats, Hadestown, The Good Place, and Parodies for Charities

A few reminders that I hope you'll find useful:

Hanukkah is two seconds after Thanksgiving this year.

Christmas isn't far off, either.


That means that, in exchange for donating to help end homelessness, you can give a gift like this Miracle Max/Jellicle Cats nonsense. Or this Good Place/Hadestown nonsense. Or some other nonsense, custom-written for your friends, your family, and your in-jokes.

Happy holidays, and I hope to write you some nonsense!

Saturday, June 26, 2021

Recommendations, nine of which are books

It was, of course, a weird year (or so) for virtually anything--but I'm happy to say that my weird year's activities included serving on the Boston Globe-Horn Book Award committee with Luann Toth (chair) and Nicholl Denice Montgomery. Just as I grew sick of the sight of my own walls, those walls became lined with ever-shifting piles of books, culminating in this pile of winners and honor books, which were announced Wednesday:

From top: Fiction and Poetry winner and honor books; Nonfiction winner and honor books; Picture Book winner and honor books.

I'm thrilled with the choices we ended up with, and highly recommend every one of these books. 

This was my second award committee (and not my first set of Zoom deliberations--the Sydney Taylor Book Award was chosen remotely before it was cool). Though the two experiences were different, each one showed me new things about what I value in books; paradoxically, I've found that committee work teaches you about yourself as an individual. I highly recommend that, too.

(Also, bookshelves. I recommend bookshelves.)




Sunday, January 10, 2021

A fantasy for 2022

(I started a post about the new year. It came out weird. Instead, here is a very short story set in the fairly near future.)


I'm sitting on a bus, on my way to visit loved ones. I check the news on my phone; the news is boring, so I go back to the physical book on the seat next to me. (As this is a fantasy, I have excellent habits and am not even tempted to scroll a whole bunch of social media. Also, I have a row to myself.) 

I flip to check something in the back matter. I flip back and read on.


Happy New Year. Let's keep turning pages.








Sunday, November 22, 2020

Still here, still reading, still thankful

How's everyone doing? I'm still reading (mostly e-books), still writing, still offering parodies for charities (and now feeling one of this song coming on, in which "here" refers specifically to my living room. I'm sure you can relate). Still healthy and (always, but it's especially in season) still thankful.

A few updates:

I got to participate in the Post-Publication Panel, and talk about how book reviews and awards work, at the Jewish Book Council's Children's Book Writers & Illustrators seminar last weekend. Recap here.

I'm excited to serve on the 2021 Boston GlobeHorn Book Award committee. Chair Luann and fellow judge Nicholl and I will be selecting winners and honor books in the Picture Book, Fiction and Poetry, and Nonfiction categories from books published from June 2020 through May 2021. 

Like I said, still reading. And still thankful.

Have a happy, healthy, safe Thanksgiving!


Saturday, October 10, 2020

Bye-Bye, Waiting for Action: a Parks & Rec-inspired song about voting

Parodies for Charities proceeds are now going to When We All Vote. Many thanks to those who responded to this poll with the more challenging, more interesting option for P4C to commission from itself. You too could have a ridiculously specific song of your very own; commission away!

To the tune of "Bye-Bye, Li'l Sebastian," a.k.a. "5,000 Candles in the Wind"

verse
Yelling? Caring loudly? Here’s the thing:
there’s hope and change your words can bring.
But once—that’s the whole amount—
you get to mark a choice that you know will count.
 
chorus
Bye-bye, waiting for action.
We needn’t be the saddest faction.
Bye-bye, waiting for action.
You might be the one to change the wind.
 
verse
Up and down your ballot, have your say.
Who’s all done, and who should stay?
Wear your mask, or be remote.
Somehow, cast your stinkin’ vote!
 
chorus
Bye-bye, waiting for action.
(‘Cause last time needs a full retraction.)
Bye-bye, waiting for action.
You might be the one to change the wind.





Sunday, May 24, 2020

Bookstores, libraries, and All This

Before All This, my dear Horn Book colleague Cindy and I went on a field trip to a number of bookstores and libraries and took pictures for a planned article about, in short, creative shelving; we also put out a call to booksellers and librarians for their own photos. The exact purpose of the article morphed, because All This came and everything morphed. But we're proud of what it morphed into: Books beyond buildings, about the why and how of supporting bookstores and libraries these days, with resources gathered by intern Mikayla.

The photos we took show how, within their buildings, booksellers and librarians help readers find their way to information, education, entertainment, and comfort. Over the past few months, as pretty much everyone needs at least some of those things, they've found ways to do that beyond their buildings.

A lot of what I know about books, the book industry, and readers comes from my years at Brookline Booksmith. When it became clear this year that I wasn't going home for Passover, my Haggadah came from there, too.

Support bookstores and libraries, booksellers and librarians. See here for some ideas.






Sunday, April 12, 2020

Things I've learned lately


  • Focusing on reading (or on anything) is hard when a situation like this is new, but it gets easier.
  • A little extra writing time is a good thing.
  • Restricting yourself can teach you a lot about physical description via what you want to do and can't. For instance, my instincts have taught me that "she pressed her hand to her mouth" is a realistic way to convey that a character is stressed out.
  • The world of e-books and digital galleys is a useful one and a complicated one. (I will have learned more things about it soon.)
  • It is possible to be busy, to feel busy, or both in any situation. It's also possible to create a highly structured routine.
  • Meeting, reading, and talking is great over Zoom and the like. Singing in unison is less great, but sometimes still worth it.
  • Holidays that aren't perfect are extra-memorable.
  • Creating something silly really is good for mental health, as others have realized. (On a related note, Parodies for Charities proceeds are currently going to Americares.)
  • Breathing with a bandana over your nose will fog up your glasses.
  • I own more comfy t-shirts than I realized.
  • There are a lot of side streets I hadn't explored within walking distance of my home.
  • I'm hugely lucky in a huge number of ways.
  • There are amazing people in hospitals, nursing homes, grocery stores, pharmacies. Driving garbage trucks and delivery vehicles. Teaching classes online, livestreaming art, clapping or singing out windows. Doing essential or enriching things I hadn't thought of, and probably things I still haven't thought of.
I suspect there's more learning ahead, both while this is going on and when we try to get back to normal. Wishing you good health, good books, and good people to connect with.

Saturday, January 18, 2020

Jo Didn't Start the Fire

When one is lucky enough to see song parodist Randy Rainbow and an excellent adaptation of Little Women in the same weekend, one writes a song parody. 

Little Women
Sisters four
Concord, Mass
Civil War
Beth’s bit—
I’ll admit
I about sobbed
Scorched dress
Sold hair
Who asked you, Professor Bhaer?
Pickled limes
Trying times
Greta was robbed.

Jo didn’t start the fire.
It was Amy’s rages
that destroyed the pages.
Jo didn’t start the fire.
No, she didn’t light it.
She just tried to write it.

*with apologies to Billy Joel


Monday, December 16, 2019

Dear A-Decade-Ago Me...

Dear A-Decade-Ago Me,

There's good stuff coming.

You'll be a bookseller for a few years, and get more out of it than you expect. You'll also get a few let's-do-better blog posts out of it, but those will help you zero in on your own beliefs. (And you'll see more attitudes in line with some of them--partly because the discussions will get more visible, and partly just because you'll learn where to look.) When you move from bookselling to working with reviews (yes, Past Me, that will happen), your conversations about what to shelve where will come up more often than you think.

There's lots of writing and lots of revising in your future, 2010 Me. Yes, you'll find a great agent.  You'll also work with a variety of thoughtful critique partners, and by the end of the decade, you'll be in a group cohesive enough to collapse into in-joke giggles at some point in most meetings.

You'll serve on an award committee. As much as you'll learn from the other members, committee work will also, paradoxically, teach you a lot about your independent thoughts on what makes good books and what makes good representation.

Some things will surprise you. Like that Suzanne Collins/Jeff Kinney collaboration, and when Make Way for Ducklings gets turned into a trilogy.

Some things really won't surprise you. You'll love a lot of booksYou'll go to lots of great book events, and you'll celebrate the Newberys with blueberries every year, just because it rhymes. You'll continue to be an Anne-girl fangirl, which will feed into your interest in adaptations. Harry Potter won't have faded from your life when the decade ends (pro-tip: if you're going to read it aloud over Skype, do so with an audience tolerant of terrible voices. That audience is your sister). You probably also won't be surprised to learn that the surprises mentioned above are fake, because what's the point of a blog without April Fool posts? (There really is a Hunger Games prequel on the way in the next decade, though. If we're defining decades as beginning with the zero-year, which we clearly are in this post.)

There's not-great stuff coming, too, in your small world and in the larger one. That's how decades work. Silliness is usually at least part of the answer. For example, selling song parodies in exchange for charitable contributions.

Oh, and you'll start a blog a few months into the decade. Thanks for that.

Sincerely,
You, a Decade Later



Monday, February 11, 2019

Book awards and blog tours!

So we picked some winners (and honors and notables). It was fun! I learned a lot about books and awards and what makes the former deserve the latter, and about Jewish history and diversity, and about my own thoughts on the role of Jewish books in the larger diverse-books conversation. It was especially meaningful to start my term on the Sydney Taylor committee in the first year the award was included in the ALA Youth Media Awards announcement, along with other deserving affiliate awards.

Being on the committee feels full-circle for me because of a strong personal connection with Sydney Taylor's books; I've learned this year that such connections are more common than I realized. Case in point: Younger Readers Category winner All-of-a-Kind Family Hanukkah, an original story about Sydney Taylor's characters that satisfies even the most loyal of AoaKF superfans. I interviewed author Emily Jenkins and illustrator Paul O. Zelinsky for the Horn Book's Out of the Box blog as part of the Sydney Taylor Book Award Blog Tour, and the care they put into every detail of the book is clear from their answers.

The STBA Blog Tour continues all week, all over the Internet:


SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 10, 2019
Emily Jenkins and Paul Zelinsky, author and illustrator of All-of-a-Kind Family Hanukkah
Sydney Taylor Book Award in the Younger Readers Category
At Out of the Box at the Horn Book

Barb Rosenstock and Mary GrandPré, author and illustrator of Through the Window: Views of Marc Chagall's Life
Sydney Taylor Honor Book in the Younger Readers Category
At A Fuse #8 Production at School Library Journal

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 11, 2019
Jonathan Auxier, author of Sweep: The Story of a Girl and Her Monster
Sydney Taylor Book Award in the Older Readers Category
At The Prosen People at The Jewish Book Council

Jane Breskin Zalben and Mehrdokht Amini, author and illustrator of A Moon for Moe and Mo
Sydney Taylor Honor Book in the Younger Readers Category
At 100 Scope Notes at School Library Journal

The Sydney Taylor Book Awards at ALA's Youth Media Awards
At the Association for Library Services to Children (ALSC) Blog

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 12, 2019
Rachel Lynn Solomon, author of You'll Miss Me When I'm Gone
Sydney Taylor Honor Book in the Teen Readers Category
At Good Reads with Ronna

Elissa Brent Weissman, author of The Length of a String
Sydney Taylor Honor Book in the Older Readers Category
At Mr. Schu Reads

Susan Kusel & Rebecca Levitan, leadership of the Sydney Taylor Book Award Committee
At The Children's Book Podcast

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2019
Vesper Stamper, author of What the Night Sings
Sydney Taylor Book Award in the Teen Readers Category
At Seven Impossible Things Before Breakfast

Erica Perl, author of All Three Stooges
Sydney Taylor Honor Book in the Older Readers Category
At From the Mixed Up Files of Middle Grade Authors

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 14, 2019

Blog Tour Wrap-Up at The Whole Megillah

Reflections on the 2019 Sydney Taylor Book Awards at ALA at Susan Kusel's Blog

10th Anniversary of the Sydney Taylor Book Award Blog Tour at The Book of Life


Saturday, September 15, 2018

I have a new agent!

I'm thrilled to share that I'm now officially represented by Amy Stern of the Sheldon Fogelman Agency!

Amy and I found each other through #DVPit, a pitch contest for diverse voices. We also overlapped briefly in grad school, but only knew of each other; apparently in this case, the Internet is smaller than Simmons. We had a great phone conversation about my MG contemporary novel before signing, and it's clear that our visions align. I'm having fun revisiting the manuscript with our discussion in mind, and I can't wait to see what comes next!

I want to add that my experience with #DVPit has been really positive--for the obvious reason above, but also because of the diverse, supportive community of querying authors that has formed around it. I hear the next one's in October...just sayin'.




Saturday, June 16, 2018

Come play Jewish geography! (And also talk about books.)

If you're near Copley Square tomorrow, come say hi at the BPL's main branch, where we'll be celebrating fifty years of the Sydney Taylor Book Award. There will be storytimes, a "What Makes a Jewish Book?" panel, and a raffle for an American Girl Rebecca doll. (And air conditioning, which seems likely to be relevant.) I'll be the one handing out "Which All-of-a-Kind-Family sibling are you?" quizzes.

And if you're attending the AJL conference, come say hi there, too! I'll be talking tikkun olam on the "Social Justice and Jewish Children's Books" panel on Monday at 2 p.m., and taking a Simmons-ish look at this years winners on the "Sydney Taylor Winners Through an Academic Lens" panel on Tuesday at 9 a.m. I'm excited to meet (or reconnect with!) my fellow committee members and hear their takes on the winners in their session, and to hear from the authors and illustrators themselves. See you there!



Monday, March 12, 2018

Just put the book out there


We're celebrating Women's History month with 31 days of posts focused on improving the climate for social and gender equality in the children’s and teens’ literature community. Join in the conversation on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/kidlitwomen or Twitter #kidlitwomen. 



There were many things I loved about bookselling. I did not love the books with titles like Stories for Boys and Stickers for Girls.

Yes, "for boys" and "for girls" right in the titles. No, this was not a long time ago.

I avoided facing these books out even if it meant reworking the whole rest of a shelf, and I would've gagged before recommending them to customers. I also grumbled about them. A lot.

Okay, I may also, occasionally, have done some grumbling about books without these sorts of titles that were clearly made with girls, boys, or their adult gift-buyers in mind. But labels--labels written on covers, and labels spoken by adults--were the real problem. 

Some girls do want to read about clothes or fashion or princesses, and some boys do want to read about superheroes and sports. 

And vice versa. And some kids want to read about both. And some kids get placed in one group, but identify with the other one or with neither.

Just put the book out there. Just let it be there for whoever finds it interesting. Don't slap it with a label--whether in its title or in the way you talk about it--that says "this is not for you" and "there's something wrong with you if you want it" and "there are exactly two categories, each with its own menu" and "only people in your own group have interesting stories for you." 

Most of those, and certainly that last one, matter for reasons beyond gender.

Things have improved a little, even just in the past few years. There are fewer books with these "fors" and implied "not-fors" right on their covers. But we still hear books described this way. And we hear, say, chapter books about POC girls described as "Ramona for _____ kids."

Kids hear it, too.

Kids get older, and they create. Some create stories, or re-imagine existing ones. They create chances for people to imagine themselves and others in various roles. They create roles for themselves.

Let's not tell them some things aren't for them.

Sunday, February 4, 2018

The Sydney Taylor Book Award Blog Tour: Tammar Stein on The Six-Day Hero

Welcome to the Sydney Taylor Book Award Blog Tour! This week, the 2018 winners and honorees will be answering questions around the Jewish/bookish blogosphere. Tammar Stein, Honor author in the Older category for The Six-Day Hero, was kind enough to chat with me about the story of Motti, a twelve-year-old Israeli boy whose life changes very quickly at a complicated moment in history.


How much of a role did your family’s memories play in this story?

That’s a great question! Before I wrote a single word, I had spent over six months researching the time period of May-June 1967. I needed to understand the geopolitical events that led to the Six-Day War, but also to understand what life was like in Israel back then. Part of the way that I was able to get all those little details was to speak with my parents. My father was an 18-year-old Israeli soldier during the Six-Day War and my mother was a teenager, living in Haifa. Over and over, I would call them to ask about some minutia. The more we spoke, the more I probed, the more their memories bubbled up. The food, the songs, the routines of daily life, all those rich details, as well as the emotional impact of the war on them all made it into the book. 


What surprised you most as you researched the war?

When I started my research, I knew very little about the Six-Day War. Namely that it was short, it reunified Jerusalem, and it tripled Israel’s landmass. Knowing only those few facts, I assumed that Israel’s winning the war was a foregone conclusion. That, as wars go, it wasn’t that scary or dangerous for Israel. But I was completely wrong. The month of May in 1967 was terrifying for Israelis. Every day brought more bad news: another former ally backing away, another Muslim country joining the coalition against Israel. At a time when 30% of Israelis were Holocaust survivors, some Arab leaders were calling for a new Holocaust. It didn’t seem like an empty threat. It seemed like history repeating itself.


Was it challenging to balance the immediate, sometimes funny details of Motti’s immediate experience with the larger, more serious events going on?

From the get-go, I knew that The Six-Day Hero was a book about a 12-year-old boy and his brothers. I wanted him to be relatable and interesting to my readers and that meant I had to infuse the natural humor and comedy of a 12-year-old’s life. It helped that during that time period, kids had astounding physical freedom. Between school and dinnertime, the city was theirs to roam unsupervised. It might be a modern parents’ nightmare, but it’s a novelist’s dream.


I loved the scene where Motti and family meet his dad’s old friend Daoud once they’re allowed to enter Jerusalem’s Muslim Quarter. Can you talk a little about the idea for that friendship?

It was my late mother's idea that I write a novel for kids about Israeli history. She was sick with cancer when I finished my first draft and she called me after she read it. She told me she had had a dream that Motti’s dad had a Jordanian friend in Jerusalem. She had even dreamt his name: Daoud. That whole scene was completely her idea. She was right, of course. Friendship between Muslims and Jews, between Israeli Arabs and Israeli Jews exists.  It’s not a dream. The lovely thing is that for a lot of my readers, that is their favorite part of the book. I love that my mom left such a beautiful, hopeful fingerprint on this book.


Motti’s older brother, Gideon, is exactly the same age as Israel. What does that mean to you?


I wanted to make the point that Israel was so young. It’s kind of a unique situation. When you live in a young country, there are so many things that can feel unsettled. There isn’t that certainty that it was always there and will always be there. 



Thanks, Tammar! And check out Bildungsroman later this morning for an interview with Kathy Kacer, Honor author in the Teen category for To Look a Nazi in the Eye.

Tuesday, January 23, 2018

Coming soon: the Sydney Taylor Book Award Blog Tour!

The schedule is up for the Sydney Taylor Book Award Blog Tour! Watch this space for an interview with Tammar Stein, STBA Honor author for The Six-Day Hero, on February 4th, and see the link for where and when to find interviews throughout the blogosphere (okay, the kidlit-and/or-Jewish part of it) with the other honorees and winners. Come kvell with us!


Saturday, December 30, 2017

Out with the garbage fire, in with...

I can't say that I'll especially miss 2017. It's become almost a cliche to call the year a garbage fire, and indeed, much of it was a hot, stinky mess. But the intersecting worlds of writing and children's lit are excellent sounding boards and sources of comfort and/or distraction. Here are some things I'm glad to have had in my year:

-My writing projects. I did some new stuff and did more of some old stuff, and I'm excited about whatever comes next for all of it.
-A new writing group that, several months in, feels like a remarkably well-matched set of people and a generally really good thing.
-Parodies for Charities. Proceeds are currently going to the Hispanic Federation; commission some ridiculous writing today! (Hmmm, maybe a 2017 edition of this song? Or this one, retitled "Goodbye, Fire of Trash?")
-A whole lot of books, which I got to write about and discuss with smart people (in between our discussions about food).

As 2018 gets closer (someone please put a warm coat on Baby New Year), I'm excited about:

-More of all of the above!
-Starting my next writing project. I have only vague thoughts at this point about what it will be, but that means the possibilities are endless.
-My first-ever award committee. I'm an incoming member of the Sydney Taylor committee, which is exciting for a lot of reasons, including the AJL Conference in June. (It's in Boston, and it's before ALA. You should come!)

Hope your 2017 had some good things in it, and hope your 2018 has even better things. Happy New Year.


Saturday, November 18, 2017

Happy anniversary, Parodies for Charities!

Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes.
Twelve months of mimicry, four full quarters of rhymes.
I've had a year of selling silliness in. It's
because we're living in interesting times.

A year ago today, in a fit of wanting to do something, I announced that that something would be selling parodies of all sorts to benefit organizations in need. Since then, I've gotten to write scenes for people's spouses, raps for people's coworkers, and songs for people's cats; to parody picture books, Gilmore Girls, The Daily Show, and a disproportionate number of showtunes. Requests have ranged from the broad ("here are some things the recipient likes; go to town") to the specific ("the chorus should stay the same, and here's what the verses should be about"). My writing has grown; my knowledge of Sam Seaborn's speech patterns and the metrical quirks of "Down with OPP" has increased. This is fun, is what I'm saying. Fun in exchange for donations to CAIR and First Book and The Trevor Project and others.

Many thanks to those who've participated so far! The offer still stands: a $10 charitable donation gets you a parody (more details here). Proceeds are currently going to the Hispanic Federation. Your choice how you earmark your gift; their drop-down menu includes everything from Puerto Rico Hurricane Relief to Immigrants: We Get the Job Done Coalition.

P4C was started with the holiday season in mind, and look at that--the holidays are coming again. As always, email shoshana dot flax at gmail dot com for all your parody needs.